“All I want for Christmas is my two front teeth.”

                                                ~ The Platters

Santa’s not the only one making a list and checking it twice. We dragged out the Christmas card and gift lists from last year (well, last several years), and cross-checked with our mostly-current address books. The Christmas card list was relatively simple — just err on the side of caution. Few people get upset if they receive too many Christmas cards.

However, not forgetting someone on the gift list is a crucial holiday requirement, and it’s not just Santa’s naughty list you would end up on. Even with Amazon delivery, it’s hard to hide the fact that you forgot someone until you received their gift, then had to scramble to find something for them.

Back in the olde days, our gift list included lots of small kids, making it relatively easy to find something they would probably like. Adults have always been harder to buy for, particularly now that so few men wear ties to work and women are less likely to appreciate a new apron. (It’s harder these days to ship alcohol, too.) There’s also the age issue, in that I’m not always in tune with what other old people or much younger ones are up to.

Food can be a good general fall-back gift, and lots of catalogs offer an assortment of goodies, sweet or savory, that are suitable for holiday celebrations. However, we feel driven to find just the perfect gift for each person, reflecting our love and adoration unique to them. That can be difficult for people you live with or know intimately, but it’s even harder for people you only see infrequently or in specific situations. (I mean, really, does Aunt Lolita actually need more bubble bath or perfume? Does Uncle Elmer really want another pair of wool socks?)

For some age groups, specifically teens, gift cards are a good out. Maybe not for clothing, but movies, video games, art or sports equipment, whatever. It’s harder to figure out for us old folks, retired and no longer routinely going into the office or to another job. For sure, that bath robe you got the first year of retirement was great, but five more won’t do much for you.

Of course, we should never look gift horses in the mouth, so we gratefully accept what we receive and will certainly gush our thanks to the givers … for the thought, if not the item. (Only in some circumstances is it acceptable to ask for the gift receipt so it can be exchanged. However, in some rare cases it may be appropriate to flag a note on the ‘gifts received’ list for next year.)

And there is another struggle these days, in that, with so many of our recipients out-of-town, everything must be shipped. Catalog buying is an ideal solution, but can get complicated around whether to ship to yourself and remail so that you can wrap and package it yourself or just have the merchant ship directly to the recipient. A Christmas tree littered with brown shipping boxes is far less festive than the one we visualize covered with brightly wrapped packages and home-made gift tags. Depending on the merchant,, the outside of the box may even provide a clue as to the contents, thus spoiling the excitement of Christmas morning. (Of course, if you just send food gifts, they should be opened on receipt anyway.)

I suppose I am making too big a deal out of Christmas shopping and selecting the right gift for each person. I remember when families tended to live near each other and showing up on Christmas Eve, gifts in hand, to be welcomed in for a toddy or treats was the norm. Christmas was less about the gifts then than the convivial gatherings. They offered the chance to actually sit and visit with your aunts and uncles, cousins or just friends. Christmas wasn’t so much about the gifts as the gathering. In our busy lives, school, work or distance seemed to interfere with time spent together. Then, the magic of Christmas was the people.

However, I’ll note that in your absence, I will gladly accept your gift.

“Gee, if I could only have my two front teeth
Then I could wish you, Merry Christmas!”